Coffee Shop Journal

Groundhog Day, starring Bill Murray, is one of my favorite movies, even if it is a little repetitious! For years, friends of mine would come over every Groundhog Day for a meal and a little time reliving Murray’s frustration at having to live the same day over and over and over. There is a segment of time during the movie when Murray stops fighting against his fate and starts using the time available to him differently. He begins to read French poetry in the coffee shop. He takes piano lessons. He learns how to sculpt ice. That part of the movie has always fascinated me. What would I choose to learn if — like Murray’s character — I had all the time in the world available to me?

Recently Mark Batterson blogged about a book he is reading, Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell. Here is a part of what he wrote.

I’m currently reading Malcolm Gladwell’s new book, Outliers. Wanted to share a finding I’ve heard before. Basically, it takes 10,000 hours to become an expert at anything! It doesn’t matter whether it’s athletics or academics. According to Gladwell, there are no “naturals.” You have to put in the time. Generally speaking, the only difference between an elite person in any field and everybody else is usually a few thousand hours of practice time.

I find this study so empowering. Anybody can become an expert in just about anything. Obviously, you need a baseline of talent if you’re talking about music or sports. But you can accumulate knowledge and become an expert.

Wow. Did you catch that? It’s basically my Groundhog Day come to life. With 10,000 hours of practice at nearly anything, you can become an expert. So what are we waiting for? What is it that we want to become an expert in? Batterson went on to say that in becoming a great writer, you must put in the hours to becomea great reader. He estimates he’s ready 2,500 books since high school, adding up to over 10,000 hours. I thought about that, knowing that I’ve got him beat on the number of books. Yet, am I an exert? Not really.

One of Batterson’s readers, Jason Condon, responded in the comment section with his analysis of the book and another recommendation. Condon read “Talent is Overrated” by Geoff Colvin. In this book, the principle of 10,000 hours holds true, but Colvin takes it a step further. For you to develop that expertise, the hours of practice need to be intentional and directed. In other words, no one becomes an expert by accident! Jason Condon provided a link to his extensive notes of the second book, Talent is Overrated. After reading his summary I am excited to go out and get the book for myself, though I feel as if I’ve digested the important parts of the message. They are some of the best notes on a book I’ve run across. Click here to go check out Jason’s notes, and thank you, Jason, if by some chance you read this.

So we are back to our original question. It’s the start of a new year. What do you want to learn this year? Do you want to become an expert in a field? Or just learn a new skill? This year has over 8,000 hours in it. Those hours are going to slip by or they are going to be used intentionally. Unlike Bill Murray, we have a choice.

Here are a  links to other blogs reviewing Talent is Overrated. I’m sure I’ll be reviewing it myself in the near future!

Leadership Challenge

Mark Needham

We all get introspective around the first of the year, and I’m no exception. I finally got some time today to sit in Jeremy’s Starbucks and just read and think. Right now I am reading Ron Martoia’s new book, Transformational Architecture. Ron’s writing is not the kind you can zip through at a breakneck pace! His last book, Static, really impacted my thought process and I can already feel this one doing the same thing.

Today, I was thinking about the overarching story of how God works in our world. Ron points out that this story, or narrative, is what gives meaning and cohesion to our lives. When we see how we fit into the big picture, so to speak, it makes everything clearer in our little arc of storyline. Our purpose is defined by God’s amazing story.

That’s when I was - finally — able to put my Christmas and New Year’s into perspective. You see, I’ve been pushed and pulled from all directions. My husband and I call it being ‘nibbled to death by ducks.” We’ve been constantly answering the phone or doorbell to some amazing ministry and fellowship opportunities. Each of these opportunities thrilled us and make us happy to be where God wants us to be, but they do drain our reserves. I began to feel, recently, as if I have nothing left to write because I am too busy wiping counters or making plans for others. One of my out of town guests said, “You all live in a community center, not a house.” He wasn’t far wrong!

And yet I know that God gave David and me a very specific call to be a haven for people who need one. So should it surprise me that my doorbell keeps ringing? Why in the world would I be surprised at that when it’s the very situation I’ve been working toward? Seeing the overall story, God’s story for my life and his story for all of history, has helped me today put my time and opportunities into the narrative. This IS what God intended for my holiday season. These were the opportunities to make my life count in the place he has me.

Not interruptions, each of these doorbell ringers were the POINT.I just had to slow down long enough to get the point.

I’m speechless!

The new year has dawned, and I let it go by without a word from me. No blog, no resolutions, no words at all. Those of you who know me, know how truly out of character that is. To make matters worse, no reading. Not a word (except Twilight - true confessions). 

For these few days of New Year’s, I’ve been living moment to moment with company in town, more company in town, more activities, movies, dinners. It’s been a hectic, chaotic rush of fellowship and fun. And I’ve been tired.

And still no words.

Until last night. I was at the gym listening to the Robbie Seay Band yet again and the aching beauty of one of their songs reminded me in a wonderful rush how very much God loves us. He gives us brand new days to remind us of all the good moments in life. One part of the lyric says, “You and me dancing in the kitchen at 3 AM; everything’s all right.” And just like that, I realized how true it was. 

It’s a brand new year, a brand new day. God can use it in any way at all. And really, there are no words to describe that.

Happy New Year.

A strong cup of coffee has a greater effect on men than women, research shows.

In a study on 668 healthy volunteers, an espresso pepped up men after just 10 minutes. Women also became more alert after the beverage, but less so.

The University of Barcelona researchers say some of this effect might be psychological because decaffeinated coffee also worked to some extent.

Progress in Neuro-Psychopharmacology & Biological Psychiatry reports the work.

The volunteers were asked to drink either a classic espresso containing 100mg of caffeine or a decaffeinated espresso containing 5mg of caffeine.

Then the researchers looked for changes in alertness over the following minutes and hours.

Both men and women saw an improvement in their activity levels after drinking the classic espresso and these effects began after as little as 10 minutes.

Source: BBC NEWS http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/7797132.stm

Let’s face it…bloggers write because they have to. Their hearts and minds won’t rest until what is inside spills out onto the page. I’ve written two posts already today (one for a future draft), but I just got back from the gym and I have to write. I have to. Please forgive me in advance, because this is probably going to be a self-indulgent moment or two for me to slap myself in the face and get going with my life.

I’ve written before about my mother. She is 76 and is in the early to moderate stages of Alzheimer’s disease. She does not believe she has that “horrible disease that old people get.” Some days, I don’t believe she has it, either. Some days, she is my mother: a strong woman who has lived through the loss of two adult sons and her husband, leaving only me. She is the woman who, in the face of adversity in her younger years, chose to adopt a daughter after having two sons through natural childbirth. She is the woman who taught me how to read (thank you!), how to throw a party, how to keep a house well even though I don’t usually listen to that last bit. She taught me how to love — well, and truly — my husband, by modeling her unwavering love for her husband. Some days she is that person, who shares my memories and my life.

There are other days when she is gone already. Her mind won’t form the words she needs for the most basic of life experiences, and this frustrates her. It frustrates us, too. We play charades, and learn what it is she wants to say in excruciatingly small steps. She refers to her family as “I had two boys,” forgetting or relegating me to another class of child. Like a middle schooler, her loyalty extends to the last person who did a kind deed for her, but no further.

I wonder, on those days, whether the thoughts that make their garbled way to the surface are the true thoughts or false imposters. Did she really feel this way, down under the way she thought she should feel? So many days her loneliness is heavy on us all. It doesn’t matter what we do, we are not the one person she wants to see. We can’t help. Alone — even with others — she sits and listens to her preachers on television, knowing that there is only One who can ease the loneliness now.

And so we wait. I wait. My brothers are gone now, and though there are sisters-in-law and grandchildren to help me, I feel the responsibility on my shoulders because I just don’t know what else to do. On the days when my name no longer comes easily to her lips and she only speaks well of someone else, I hurt. But I love her. She is the one to whom God wants me to give myself away. It’s just so hard…and some days I just have to hit the gym and run it all away.

I love facebook status updates. I will confess, I am a junkie. In just a few words and a quick flick of my thumb on my iPhone, I know what my friends near and far are doing. Admit it, you like it, too! Status updates are usually innocuous: just a blip of time on a computer screen. But have you ever gone back to see the cumulative effect of your updates?

Recently, my friend Jeremy has faced an interesting dilemma. A frequent twitterer took over an old twitter name and began posting his updates. We don’t know who this twitterer is, just an anonymous cyber-dweller. But his twitters began posting to Jeremy’s facebook as status updates. At first, no one seemed to notice. Apparently Jeremy — normally a trusting-in-God because He’s in control anyway kind of guy — was stressing out a bit more than normal. Following one of his updates (”Jeremy wonders if he’s ever good enough” or some such phrase), David and I plopped ourselves down at his Starbucks bar to see what in the world was up with our friend. He seemed fine. Cappuccino after cappuccino, drink after drink, Jeremy was his usual amazing Starbucks-self. I looked down at my iPhone and saw his status update again, with language I KNOW Jeremy doesn’t use. And he certainly wasn’t updatoing his facebook in the middle of the pre-Christmas drink rush! Imposter!

Over the next two weeks, I watched Jeremy’s status updates go by, trying to decide which ones were real and which were fake. It was actually pretty easy. I began to feel very sorry for our anonymous twitterer, who apparently spends quite a bit of time feeling hung over and inadequate, trapped in an icy-cold climate. Then I watched Jeremy’s family and friends begin to fly in to the rescue, checking to find out what was wrong with their friend! “Are you OK? Seriously…call me.” Messages were posted on walls. Every day Jeremy posted status updates reminding us all that his status updates weren’t all his own, but even so he had people every day wondering what was happening in his life.

So here’s my point: if your status updates were hijacked, would people notice? Would people know that statements are out of character? Would they care enough to check in and find out what was happening in your life? How about your friends? When you scroll down and see the person who always posts with exclamation points leaving very existential, depressed updates, do you check in with them?

The opposite of scarcity, recession and fear is…enough. That’s what God’s apparently planning to teach me this year. Everywhere I turn, that’s what he is reinforcing in my mind. It’s enough. I’m enough. You have enough. I own the cattle on 10,000 hills, and that is enough.

On the treadmill today, Chris Tomlin’s “Your Grace is Enough…” is what triggered the thought process. The basic premise is this: everywhere we turn we are going to be bombarded with scarcity messages. The news tells us we are in tough shape. The malls tell us the shopping season was horrible. And yet, God is telling us that he is enough. We have enough. He is able to do it all.

And when we figure out the enough is enough…God’s grace is free to work in miraculous, unexpected ways. I think it sounds like an adventure, seeing how God is going to prove that his enough is more than enough. Who is up for the adventure with me? Are you ready to experience — for once in our llives — enough?

These days of stillness between Christmas and New Year’s always catch me by surprise. I’m unprepared for the state of suspension, not quite sated with Christmas and yet not ready to embrace the freshness of the New Year. I attempted, this year more than most, to be intentional about our Christmas. Compared to previous years I believe I made progress, though not as much as I had hoped. Rather than move on to the New Year’s thoughts and plans, I thought I’d take this first post after Christmas to reflect. Who knows: maybe next year I’ll actually be prepared! So…

• We changed up our Christmas day routines a little to reflect all the people we wanted to spend time with this year. We made time during the day to spend a little longer with David’s family, let Jillian spend time with a friend, and invite friends over in the evening to share more food and fun. Christmas day routines have been kind of a sacred cow in our extended family, so having that flexibility was freeing.
• The little things seemed to be the most fun this year. The infamous blue bag held delightful necklaces for all the girls in the family. I was excited because David picked one for me that I had never seen before and yet loved. But as fun as the TIffany necklace is, it’s the Apple bag that has brought me the most pleasure so far! He got me earphones for my iPod that have a little clip to go over my ears, solving an annoying problem for me. Every time I am on the treadmill or elliptical, my earphones used to pop out of my ears! Yesterday they stayed put for the first time ever. The little things.
• Sitting aroud waiting for Jillian to come home, we amused ourselves by opening a few presents. That did NOT amuse her, by the way. We started playing with one of those Nap pillows for Brookstone, shaped like a U. The friends who were with us started a game of “Props.” What could this pillow be? We laughed for thirty minutes over that. Small things amuse us, I guess. My mother thought we were making fun of her pillow and took it away from us.
• I did end up purchasing water for charity:water, and giving out the cards as gifts. Unfortunately for me (but not really, because it IS a charity) I bought too many and never gave out all the cards. That’s ok. It was still my favorite gift.

That’s about it for Christmas. We definitely had more fun with the people than the process this year, would love to simplify some more for next year. We made time to stop and sit by the tree, gave in on some of the decorations not being up, and nearly killed ourselves with the Snow Ball.

Now to clean up…

We just got back from Christ Fellowship’s Christmas Eve service. We planned to go to the latest one, 8 PM, so that it would feel like Christmas Eve. I don’t have the time or energy to write all I thought about tonight, and you are pretty busy as well…no time to read. So in random order, a few thoughts.

• I love our choir. I was watching them worship tonight. Wow. We happen to have, in our choir, several people with disabilities. One woman rides a scooter. One woman rides a scooter and is missing a leg. Another woman is blind, and sings with her guide dog next to her. These women bless my socks off. They have faces that shine. Tonight I was imagining what Christmas in heaven will be like…celebrating Christ’s birthday party each year. Do you know what? Those ladies are gonna be dancing. They were dancing in their hearts tonight. They will dance in reality on that day. Can’t wait to see it.
• I love the ending of the service each year, when we light candles — little candles — in the room and slowly turn off the lights. Those little candles light up the huge room. Yes, there’s a metaphor for our role in the world/community  there. You can flesh out the rest of the metaphor!
• I love our new building. Yes, I know that big buildings are “controversial” but I loved seeing our people stream into the life center and — this is the radical part — STAY. They stayed. They talked. They celebrated. They ate, and drank coffee. Happy.
• I love the milestone. I thought back to last year, thought about all the paths through which God has led me. I thought about the people I’ve connected with and reconnected with. Unbelievable what God has done.

I could get carried away here, but won’t. There are presents to wrap, kitchens to clean (even at midnight) and sleep to be had!

Merry Christmas, my friends.

This is what David was holding when I met him for lunch today.

And the first words out of my mouth were “You went to Apple? Cool!”

There is just something wrong with that.