Coffee Shop Journal

I recently watched a video based on the book Jim and Casper Go to Church. The book, which I haven’t read yet but is on its way (thanks to Amazon 1-click!), is the story of  an atheist who visits our churches and offers up his opinion. I am anxious to read his words, painful as they are likely to be. If you want to, watch the video over on Ed Bahler’s blog, here.

The words that convicted me are these: Matt Casper asks us as Christians to invite him into our homes and our hearts before trying to “sell” him on our religion. This statement, from an atheist, is perhaps the best theology of hospitality that I have read recently. So many times in our homes and in our interactions in the community we are only willing to extend a superficial friendship, a shallow grace. We are willing to sit and chat with an “outsider” (to use the term the book unChristian uses), but we are very slow to open our hearts in true friendship. To some of us, it is even unthinkable if we are honest with ourselves.

And yet, through the ages of Christianity the act of sharing a meal in friendship has been the most powerful demonstration of just what Christ did for us. Matt Casper’s comment reminded me of a chapter in Brennan Manning’s class book The Ragamuffin Gospel. Consider this quote:

In the year of 1925, if a wealthy plantation owner in Atlanta extended a formal invitation to four colored cotton pickers to come to his mansion for Sunday dinner, preceded by cocktails and followed by several hours of brandy and conversation, the Georgia aristocracy would have been outraged, neighboring Alabama infuriated, and the Ku Klux Klan apoplectic. Sixty or seventy years ago in the deep South, the caste system was inviolable, social and racial discrimination inflexible and indiscretion made the loss of reputation inevitable.

Today the lines of reputation in the Christian community are not based on race, as in 1925, but they are based on insider standing. Outreach to an outsider is permissible, perhaps coffee, but inviting them into your home? Scandalous.

So I ask you, have you lost your reputation yet? I know my reputation is still largely intact, a matter of conviction that Matt Casper so kindly pointed out. And he is so right. One more quote from Ragamuffin Gospel.

Through table fellowship Jesus ritually acted out his insight into Abba’s indiscriminate love — a love that causes His sun to rise on bad men as well as good, and His rain to fall on honest and dishonest men alike (see Matthew 5:45). The inclusion of sinners in the community of salvation, symbolized in table fellowship, is the most dramatic expression of the ragamuffin gospel and the merciful love of the redeeming God.

This is a good one, too. It is on the new media and how it can be used in the church.

Because this is part of our group history…

David and I have been doing extensive “field work” picking our favorite coffee shops around town! It’s a hard job, but someone has to do it. Pray for me in this endeavor.

I’m totally kidding…we’re having a blast making friends all over town, to tell you the truth. As I’ve mentioned before, the bars are really the friendliest spots where people are most open to conversation. But it doesn’t set quite the example I want to set for my kids to be hanging out in bars, so we’ve been looking for the friendliest coffee shops instead. South Florida has a strange sense of community. Actually, they have very little sense of community. That lack of “place” is probably our biggest frustration. There are literally no hometown choices within a 20 minute radius, so Starbucks it is. So this is how we’ve tried to establish ourselves in the community during this intense season of caffeination.

1.  We know nearly all the barista’s names in our three top spots. We are trying to consciously limit ourselves to the top three, too. There are only so many relationships you can nurture!
2. We make sure we are in the coffee shop at least two to three times a week.
3. We stay put in the shop for at least an hour, preferably more. During that time we make sure we get up and down a few times.
4. Talk! I’ve had some really interesting conversations lately, with people who are very diverse. The new perspective this has given me is invaluable.
5. Bring an interesting book. I’ve said it before, your book is the best conversation starter there is! A follow-up to that should be obvious: be sensitive in what book you choose to read!
6. Be a friend. You are a “guest” in this coffee shop, or any other place you find yourself in the community. This is not the time to preach, beg or exhort. I really don’t think there’s ever a time to do those things. Just learn to be part of the community and open your heart and mind to new relationships. Sitting at my coffee shop in Lexington, Massachusetts one rainy day I got to learn all about the world of cut throat scrabble competitions in Lexington. Use this time to learn and listen.

I don’t know if any of this is helpful to you or not. I just thought I’d tell you what we are trying to do around here to build community. It’s all part of a journey, and I’d love to hear from you on your journeys, too. Your community is probably different from mine. You might actually have a community! The title of Howard Schult’z book kind of says it all: “It’s not about the coffee.”

This is an interview with Mark Batterson, the author of In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day, pastor of National Community Church, and let us not forget Ebenezer’s Coffee shop! These behind the scenes interviews were going on all day. That is Carlos Whittaker — Ragamuffin Soul himself! — on the left, and Tony Morgan on the right. Also there is Dave Gibbons, who I got to hear at Q. Fun little interview here.

Talk about places we’d all like to be! Rick Warren called a “Stealth Summit” calling together top pastors to talk about ministry. In addition, he had top bloggers come to cover the event. Go to Ragamuffin Soul to see the list of speakers and bloggers, or go to the ustream live broadcast by clicking this link. They literally sit down some of the nation’s top pastors and start asking them questions over the net and in person. Awesome.

I am conviced that the only thing between you and your destiny is one small act of courage. One courageous choice may be the only thing between you and your dream becoming reality. And it may be as simple as placing a phone call, downloading an appliation or sending an e-mail. But you’ve got to push the first domino.

– In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day by Mark Batterson

It has been a long day here getting ready for graduation on Saturday and a family wedding in Oregon the week after. When we are tired, none of us keeps their temper very well. Except David…he’s always the same day in and day out. I’m trying to organize us all for the rather intense days ahead, and feel like I’d rather crawl in bed. So I am rereading this chapter in “Lion” to “screw my courage to the sticking place” (Beauty and the Beast quote…very eclectic tonight) and do the next thing on my list.

Pray for us all over the next few days! And look forward to some fun posts as we travel around the country a bit! Nothing like Carlos and DJ Chuang and some of the others headed to Saddleback and then WiBo, but still fun!

This is becoming a weekly habit…letting you all peek inside life in the First Place at the Saunders house! I felt like I was living in some sort of sociology experiment today, so I thought I’d share with you.

1. We woke up to 2 extra teenagers in our house - both sleeping in our daughter’s bed. Our daughter was sleeping in the family room on the couch. Not sure how that happened.
2. We got their Dunkin’ Donuts order: 2 plain bagels, 1 cinnamon raisin bagel, glazed donuts, chocolate glazed donuts and chocolate frosted donuts. The only item Dunkin’ Donuts had was the chocolate frosted donut! We went to another branch, where the drive thru attendant was sweet and gentle, and got our order just right.
3. David’s friend Matt is dropped off at our house. The two guys proceed to build a computer on our dining room table. It looked like a huge erector set in progress.
4. Jillian and her friends begin to rehearse their new song they had just written on the piano and guitar, with great vocals. This set up a conflict with the guys, concentrating on the computer. Moved the girls to another part of the house, minus piano. Wailing.
5. Spring, the grad student who lives with us, has her demonstration partner come over so they can film a video for their next class. They film in the house and in the back yard.
6. Kylie begins work on her graduation slide show, scanning pictures and pulling them all together.
7. I go to the grocery store (after a quick Iced Doubleshot with Energy Boost) and buy enough food for the extra teenagers and Spring’s grad student, who looks like he can eat a good meal.
8. By the time I get home, the grad student and extra teens have left, but the pool has filled up with our next door neighbors so we call a Community Dinner night. Good thing I had extra chicken!
9. David and Matt are still building.
10. Matt’s wife Kadi and son Ethan come to pick him up and stay to dinner. How did the chicken multiply? I don’t know…but it did!
11. Reward: the adults spent all evening sitting on the back porch discussing things like marketing and branding for churches and sermon series, small groups vs. affinity groups, the community and third spaces being designed into our new building. We looked at websites and blogs, shared books, ate all the food, and managed to tire out one little four year old boy.

Great day.

Once in awhile I hit overload. Too much information comes in, and I need time to process it! And yet…to go without reading is like a day without breathing. Impossible. So I spent the last two days reading a couple of mildly interesting books that required little interaction on my part.

The first is Beautiful Boy by David Sheff. This is his website. What a powerful story! David Sheff tells about the life of his son, Nic, and his journey into and through drug addiction. Unlike similar memoirs I’ve read in the past, the author managed to portray Nic as the beautiful, loving, incredibly smart child that he was, as well as a sense of place to their life. This background of vivid writing helped me feel the rollercoaster ride as Nic picked himself up from relapse after relapse. I don’t have any addicts close to me (that I know of…one thing I learned from this book is that you truly don’t know whether that statement is true), but Beautiful Boy helped me build empathy for those who do. Like so many others, I have often been guilty of simplifying an addiction down to “Why don’t they just stop drinking/using/smoking.” Not any more. David Sheff opened my eyes to an alternate reality, and he made me care about his family. Well done.

The second book I read was Serve God, Save the Planet by J. Matthew Sleeth. Dr. Sleeth and his family embarked on a journey to reduce their ecological footprint and use the money savings to support relief efforts overseas and here at home. None of the ideas in this book were radically new, but Dr. Sleeth combined them with real life examples that reminded me that each of these ideas is quite doable. Did you know that if we all just replaced 5 lightbulbs with fluorescent or LED lightbulbs we could take 21 coal factories offline? Small, achievable goals are the focus of this short, fun read. Perhaps especially useful is the daily, weekly and yearly goal checklist in the back of the book. I didn’t think this book affected me a whole lot, but David keeps telling me I’m talking about it every ten minutes, and I did find myself wondering whether I shouldn’t go to Whole Foods EVERY day, but maybe should plan ahead? I’m kind of joking (and kind of not). David and I are trying to think through our stewardship of energy and resources, and this book was a helpful addition to that process.

That’s all for today…I’m taking a day for laundry, cooking something fun and watching David build a computer with his friend Matt.

Last week John Maxwell spoke in our weekend services with, for him, an unusual topic. He staged the platform with three chairs, and then proceeded to ask us what chair we sit in. The chairs represent our spiritual life.

• Chair # 1 represents the level of commitment. Our lives are characterized by obedience, reading the word, prayer, reaching others.
• Chair #2 represents compromise. We obey when it is convenient and fits our plans.
• Chair #3 represents confusion. We no longer think first about God, if at all.

Here is the main point. Over time, there is a natural tendency to slide from chair 1 all the way to chair 3. You can see this in many areas of life:

Nations start out under Godly principles and move to an increasingly secular outlook.

Educational institutions begin as seminaries and end up as…Harvard, Yale etc.

Denominations begin in revival and become increasingly bureaucratical.

Sadly, this movement from chair to chair can also be found in the lifecycle of a church, the generational patterns of a family, and an individual life. Generation #1 knows God. Generation #2 knows about God and his works. Generation #3 knows nothing about God or his works. John gave some biblical examples (David - Solomon - Rehoboam, Abraham - Isaac - Jacob) and then gave us some key lessons learned from the chair.

1. The Bible and history teach us that there is a tendency to slide downward with each succeeding generation.
2. To know which chair you sit in is to know where you are spiritually.
3. To know which chair you sit in is to know where your children will be spiritually.
4. You can change chairs.